Some days it's not easy to see the light at the end of the tunnel and being joyful doesn't come naturally. Sometimes it seems like life is so easy for everyone else. During those times, its easy to get discouraged and think that God has forgotten us.
We have to know that these kind of days are temporary. Our sorrow may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning. (Psalm 30:5). When we stop focusing on the world in front of us and lift our eyes to Jesus (Hebrews 12:2), our troubles don't seem so impossible anymore.
Our thoughts should be of things that are noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). When you do this, the God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4:9).
Ultimate joy and peace will come when we rejoice in the Lord; we will know He is near. We don't have to be anxious about anything. We can come before the Lord with thanksgiving (Philippians 4:4-9).
It doesn't matter what our circumstances are, we can be full of joy. When we have Jesus, we know that we can place all of our trust in Him and he will always make our paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).
The Lord is on our side and He loves us. What greater joy is there?
Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying 'I repent,' you must forgive them. Luke 17:4
I've been hurt in my life. I've hated someone so much that I felt my only relief would be if they were dead. I've carried around bitterness and resentment that was so strong and heavy I couldn't move. I was angry and it hurt the people I love.
I knew I had to forgive. I knew that it says in Mark 11:25 that if I hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that my Father in heaven could forgive me. How could I forgive someone who caused me so much pain; someone who violated and abused my children? It was impossible for me to do it. How can I let something like that go?
The truth is, it IS impossible to forgive on my own. But with God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26). The truth is, forgiveness has little or nothing to do with the person who hurts us. It isn't saying what they did was OK. It's saying you are done carrying this burden and you're ready to give it to Jesus because He says His yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matthew 11:30). He took our pain and bore our sorrows (Isaiah 53:4). He died to break our chains (Psalm 107:14) and give us freedom and abundant life (John 10:10).
We forgive to be in relationship with God.
We forgive because it brings glory to God. I know that it was only by the power of the Holy Spirit that I was able to forgive and am now able to sincerely pray for this person. It was only God that has allowed me to tell my story and bring healing to others.
Choose to forgive.
Choose to let go.
Choose to let God take your burden and use your pain for His glory.
There is a battle raging against me and my family right now. It's one I know I can't win on my own. It's strong and fierce and coming at us from all sides. There are days I want to give up. There are moments when I feel like I can't go on. There are mornings that it takes every ounce of energy I have to get out of bed. This battle might go on a while. I'm not sure what's next, but I do know one thing. This battle belongs to the Lord. (2 Chronicles 20:15)
There is not one thing that the enemy can throw at me that will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). My God is fighting this battle for me and we will win (2 Chronicles 20:17). My future plans are secure (Jeremiah 29:11) and I will worship and praise Him for this victory before I even see it (Psalm 20). He is my refuge and my strength in times of trouble (Psalm 46:1). Sorrow may last for the night, but JOY comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5)
I can be confident in this because I know it's true. He has walked right beside me through storms that should have left me broken. He has given me back things that I thought were gone. He has given me freedom that I never thought possible. He has provided for me when there was nothing. He has promised me eternity with Him.
I'm going to praise Him and then sit back and watch Him create beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3).
If you're struggling, reach out to the One who knows you, the One who calls you by name, the One who will pull you out of the pit of despair.
My emotions, good or bad, have controlled my life for as long as I can remember. Depression, fear, and guilt have been my most natural responses when life throws me a curve ball. I curl up in a little ball and hide from the world. The bad thing about this response is I'm hiding from the very thing I want to help change. How can I tell my story when I'm driven by these destructive emotions? The truth is, I can't.
This morning I was drinking my coffee and reading my Bible, asking God to change me. He brings me to a scripture I have read so many times and have hanging by my front door. Joshua 24:15 says to choose this day who you will serve. That's when it hit me. I've been serving my emotions every day. I choose to dwell on depression, guilt, fear, and all the other things I feel on a daily basis instead of dwelling on God. He's the One who knows me and protects me. He is the One who holds my future. All the turmoil I feel inside is made to destroy, not bring life.
So this day I choose God. I choose to let Jesus go deeper than my wounds. I choose to let Him and His Words guide me and leave the rest behind.
I titled this blog "Restoring The Years" because the Lord has done so much for me, and given me back so much that I had lost. Until recently, I had no idea that He was also talking about my body. For years I thought fat = ugly. What a lie from hell.
I have struggled with depression and very low self esteem for years. I am definitely what you would call and emotional eater. The more weight I gained, the uglier I thought I was. The uglier I thought I was, the more I ate. It really is a vicious cycle. Of course, I never felt like exercising either. As Christians, we know that our body is a temple. So, I have always felt tremendous guilt for not treating it that way. All these negative emotions take take a toll and the devil LOVES it!
Lately I have been thinking about grace and what it means to me. Grace is something I definitely don't deserve. It's not something I can earn. It's just given to me freely and repeatedly. It's given to everyone. It doesn't matter who we are or what we've done. It's a second chance.
I guess we really don't look at neglecting our bodies as sin. But, I believe it is. I'm not saying that we can never have a cookie or that we have to exercise for hours each day. What I am saying is that 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. I am not my own; I was bought at a price. That right there is good enough for me.
So the other day I woke up. I realized the enemy had stolen my body away from me and it was time to get it back. Thank God for His grace and forgiveness. I realize that it will take hard work and I'm ready for it. I will definitely have to deny myself and hold myself accountable. The Holy Spirit living inside me is big enough for the job. I trust Him completely to see me through.
Thanks for reading,
Jessica
I would love to hear from anyone going through the same thing. Email me at jessicanc78@gmail.
When you are broken, you don't see things the way they really are. You see them through the lenses of a lie. You start living your life that way. The person who taught me to love Jesus had walked away from Him. Sin wasn't such a big deal anymore. You live to please yourself, not God.
I put God on the back burner of my life. I knew He was there, but He didn't really matter much. So, I started to drink with my friends a little. I started smoking pot a little. Sex was something I was talked into doing because it's just something everyone does. No big deal. But sin IS a big deal. Sin is death and it changes you.
I believed the enemy when he told me that I didn't matter and that nobody loved me. It all starts as a whispered lie. "You're not loved, Jessica", "You're ugly", "You are stupid", "You are worthless". When we start believing these lies, we change. If nobody can love us, then maybe God can't either. We make so many mistakes and do so many things that He tells us not to do, how could He love us?
That's just another lie. Satan loves to lie. John 8:44 says that when he lies, he speaks his native language. He is a liar and the father of lies. So why are we so quick to believe him?
God, on the other hand, is full of truth. It is absolutely impossible for him to deceive us. He does not lie (Titus 1:2). When He says we are worth it (Romans 5:8), believe Him. When He says He loves us (John 3:16), believe Him. He means it. Ask God to show you what lies you have been believing about Him.
Take a minute right now and ask.
Now ask Jesus what the truth is.
Embrace that truth because when you know the Truth, it will definitely set you free (John 8:32).
If you need prayer, please email me at jessicanc78@gmail.com
I was a good girl that came from a good family. I grew up in church and knew that Jesus loved me. I never caused trouble and always followed the rules. I never ran with the wrong crowd. Nobody saw it coming.
I was pregnant at 18. I had a boyfriend who said all of the right things and pretended to love me. So, I thought I had to marry that boyfriend. The next 10 years were a nightmare. I lived in a world full of lies and emotional, mental, and occasionally, physical abuse. There was drug use and adultery. I ended up having two more children during my marriage. My kids have gone through things that no one should go through. I tried to make life as normal as possible for them, but it never was. I was trapped in a living hell.
The last couple of years of my marriage, I sought the Lord with all of my heart. He was all that I had. I knew He could change my life, but I had no idea just how much He could change it. He gave me Joel 2:25-27 to hang onto and that's what I did. I believed and prayed and cried for a long, long time. There were days that I wanted to kill myself and there were days I tried to find ways to kill my husband. But God had something different in mind.
After years of abuse, neglect, and homelessness we got out. But, it didn't stop there. My kids would visit him on the weekends. I didn't find out what was going on until he went to prison. He was involving my kids in crime and horrible abuse. I found out right after we separated that he had used their social security numbers to get credit cards in their names. I pressed charges and he has been in and out of prison ever since.
I was free.
I wish I could say that everything automatically got better. It didn't. While I was free from a life of abuse, I wasn't free from the effects. I was deeply depressed and had an extremely low self esteem. Instead of turning to God for love, I looked in all the wrong places. I just wanted someone to love me and fill the void. I was so ashamed. These guys didn't love me. Alcohol didn't love me. Why was I running so hard from the One that did?
Fear. Everything I was doing was because I was afraid. I was afraid of trusting God. I was afraid of being alone and unloved. I thought God was disappointed in me for my choices. I had no idea how much Jesus really did love me.
I had had enough. One day, I decided to go back to the church I grew up in. I was so embarrassed. I thought everyone would stare and whisper about me. I thought everyone would say "I told you so". That's not what happened. I was welcomed with open arms. They had missed me. Gradually, I started praying again and I even got out my Bible. I didn't start reading it for a while, but it was a start. God was starting to heal my heart.
In the last seven years, God has restored the years the locusts have eaten....just like He said he would when He gave me the promise in Joel years before. I'm amazed every day at His love for me. He lifted me from the pit and set my feet up on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand (Psalm 40:2). I want what I went through to be a testimony of God's love and his mercy. We are NEVER too far gone. There is NOTHING too big. God is real. His love for us is not conditional. It's not based on how good we are or how much we do for Him. He loves us and meets us just where we are. He goes down into the pit we are in and lifts us out. He will do that for you just like He did for me.
I have NO regrets. I have a story to tell.
If you need prayer, please email me jessicanc78@gmail.com
